Jim's We(b Log)

This blog is what I have to do for my class. I figure if I'm going to do it, why not go all out? If you have a question or some such, you could email me at jimsweblog@gmail.com.

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Location: mizzou, United States

Thursday, June 08, 2006

INTERNET

Even though I am still on hiatus, I wanted to share this letter I wrote to the Webmaster at feardotcom.com. I have not received a reply.


Dear Webmaster,

Against my better judgment, I logged on to your site, feardotcom.com. I have to admit, you are running a pretty frightful operation although contrary to your claim that it will be the last website I will ever visit, I have checked my email twice since I first logged on to feardotcom.com.

I am writing you to inform you that I am having difficulty accessing all of the contents of your website. The counter where it says how many hours I have left to live doesn't seem to be working. This is causing me anxiety. As unreliable as websites are wont to be in this digital age, I would think that such petty technical difficulties at a website of your stature would be non-existant. Which makes me wonder, is it a technical difficulty or is there some other reason that it won't tell me how many hours I have left to live?

As far as the rest of the site is concerned, everything else seems to be working pretty good. I particularly thought the Body Game was fun yet harrowing to play.

I would like to submit another query: do you guys use in-house programmers trained in the ways of the Occult or do you outsource web management? I would think in-house, given the fatal nature of your business. While some might take for granted your knowledge of the mysterious ways of the Occult, they should also be aware that you are fluent in the ways of HTML and Flash. Do you guys use Dreamweaver?

Finally, I liked that Udo Kier was in your movie. People don't realize how prolific an actor he is, even in non-vampiric roles. I saw him at Sundance last year. He was there attending the movie Dogville (which should have been called Dogshit) in lieu of the director who could not make it to the United States due to fear of flying. He wore a puffy white snow coat and had a beautiful supermodel in his arm. He is the ultimate German frightmarish character and it was smart to insert him in your movie. I can't help but think that he is also involved heavily in the Occult. Is he?

Sincerely,

J. Weed

P.S. Does your site still kill people if cookies are disabled in their web browsers?

3 Comments:

Blogger Xrystofer said...

Awesome letter, cracked me up. You know.. what if you are actually already dead, and in limbo. That is why the clock will not work for you.... hmmmmmm

Or maybe it's just bad coding....

Who knows?!

9:00 AM  
Anonymous Kirk said...

See! You like posting long blogs, don't you!

Short blogs are great and all, but there is nothing like the sweet siren's song of a long blog entry.

Oh I tried it your way, with the concise thoughts and the limited ranting.

But welcome to my world. A world where you let yourself go on a little too long in every comment.

I am so high right now.

12:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you make me sad jimmy
where are you?

9:13 AM  

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